Tuesday, July 31, 2012

Love marriage ya arranged marriage

Scene 1, the twinkle in her eyes, the fragrance in her hair, everything about her is so heady in the courtship days, nothing and nobody would work in place of her. His voice, his looks, his caring touch, heart yearns for it after he is long gone, heart beats in waiting for the day when a meeting is planned, nothing holds her and his attention other than each other’s loving presence and sweet memories. Everything culminates into a sweet climax when they get married, that is the happy ending to an eventful love saga turning into a beginning of a so called 'love marriage'.

Cut to Scene 2, somewhere else, a boy and a girl meets where both their families are present and they are conveniently provided with some time (around 10 minutes may be) to spend with each other, and then they have tea and snacks and dryfrutis , they part ways and give their message either through the family friend who has materialized this meeting or through the broker who has brought this ‘rishta’ that ‘yes’ the boy likes the girl or the girl likes the boy or vice versa and then happens the ‘chat mangni aur pat byah’ because one of the aged relative of the boy or girl wants to see her / his pota/ poti married before they go for their eternal yatra…. And their two minute meeting also culminates into a so called ‘arranged marriage’.

On the day both the marriages are taking place, the heart beat of these couple are like drums beating in some tarzan ka jungle type , one’s out of unbearable excitement and happiness turning into delirium at dreams getting materialized and the other at the thought of (especially the girl) sweating buckets and having truckload of butterflies in her stomach, how is she going to live with a man she has only met twice?? (okay now a days may be 60 times) before marriage, well.. to cut a long story short.. even this culminates into a climax where the couple nervously, but happily, sometimes doubtfully enters into the unknown land of marriagedom – word especially coined for these innocent lambs.. err.. lives… (yes.. yes akin to martyrdom…)

Both the ‘love marriage’ guys and the ‘arranged marriage ‘ guys suffer through the same 'honey moon mania' and then the ‘please give us some private space’ to ‘please give me my space’, to ‘I will be late today’ every evening to ‘why do you keep the wet towel on the bed ‘ to ‘oh God yeh shaadi maine kyun ki’??? so at the end of the day any couple who has ‘loved’ for 10 years and gets married and a couple who gets married and loves for 10 years goes through the same rigmarole of married life, same highs and lows, same love and quarrels, same tiffs and fights and then ends up together,sometimes for the love that holds them together and sometimes for the cute little babies born out of their love…

However, being born an Indian, and a staunch ‘love marriage’ person I would any day advocate a love marriage or a love cum arranged marriage, which is the latest trend, wherein you love someone.. and then you show the person to your parents and they arrange everything and they live happily ever after !!! , well…. I would advise to rather step into a marriage with unbearable excitement and happiness turning into delirium instead of sweating buckets and having truckload of butterflies in one’s dainty stomach…


Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Let me

To stop and smell the flowers

To unload the heavy bagpack from the shoulders

To feel light and happy

To forget the feelings so heavy

To feel the rain drops

To hug and cuddle with the kids

To run around wildly with them in the parks

To enjoy their gurgles and hearty , happy laughter

To stop and smell the flowers

To unload the heavy bagpack from the shoulders

Dreams and wishes, can I touch with you a magic wand?   

Can I longingly look at you and plead you to come true??

Please stop the sands of time,

Let me be the mother with lots of time

With lots of patience and warmth

With lots of understanding and care

With lots of love and hugs

Let me ,

Let me stop and smell the flowers

Let me be the mother I want to be…..

Monday, July 23, 2012

Satyamev Jayate : An Incredibe Effort !!

Kudos to the incredible efforts put in by Aamir khan in opening the nation’s mind and eyes to various issues which are swept under the carpet or are treated with indifference. The title of his programme, ‘Satyamev Jayate’ itself is enough to bring goosebumps and patriotism to the forefront of one’s mind, one can not in any way negate or nullify the effort that he has put in bringing our attention to various burning isssues, right from female infanticide to alcoholism to challenges faced by the physically handicapped, the problems of senior citizens and the latest one on Water scarcity and issues are all absolutely sincere in its effort and it’s effect on the masses.

The beauty of this programme is that he is not only letting his audience face the depths and widths of a problem, a national issue, but he is also trying his best to give every problem a solution, and it is not as if he is providing the solutions, he is bringing to the forefront those people who had already been working on these issues, he is giving a platform to all of them to come to the limelight and adulation they so very much deserve and let be an example for so many others. Critics had gone on a rampage against his tears, his concept and trying to become a real hero attempt, but we have to accept and give him the credit he so truly deserves for this wonderful effort. I wish we could all emulate and bring to practicality what he is propagating and let our Country get rid of some of the most outrageous social issues and let her shine once again and be the ‘Sone ki chidiya’ she  was once upon a time, in terms of prosperity, culture and virtues and welfare of its Country men.

Satyamev Jayate

Monday, July 16, 2012

Scared !

It feels like a dark , hollow , suffocating tunnel which leads to nowhere. Yes, you are right, those are very very pessimistic and negative thoughts, but what else do you expect in such a dark situation where every day you hear about a rape, a molestation and kidnap and abduction of young girls and women. I am no social worker or media person but I am one of those women who venture out of the house everyday and return back after dusk and sometimes even during odd hours due to the call of duty, and I have two daughters who are growing up , and I am living in the capital of India which is unfortunately now know as the most unsafest place for women. I am appalled at the apathy and indifference of the Government and the society as a whole towards this issue. Some small towns and villagers are waking up to this but then the rules they are founding for the safety seems like out of stone age, the thought behind the rule is well taken but does banning the mobile for women under 40 and not allowing them in markets and not allowing them without male escorts going to help solve this problem forever?? Is it not fanning the female foeticide a bit more, I am sure their will be no mothers in Haryana who would ever like to have a daughter, not because they do not want it but because they would rather not have them than letting them grow up in such primitive conditions.

When small little girls are looked at as future problems and future rape victims and future ruiners of society’s peace, what is the future of these girls in the times to come. It is difficult to believe that this is the same Country where women like Jhansi ki rani, Indira Gandhi and Mother Teresa lived, it is difficult to believe that these men after a rape goes to the shrine of a ‘Mata’ to pay penance and goes and takes a dip in holy ‘ganga mata ’ to wash away those stains of undoubtedly the most heinous crime which can ever be committed.

What is it that we are doing wrong, why are our men only respectful to their mothers, why cant they have same respect to other women, why can’t women be treated as human beings, rather than sex objects, why should they be judged on the basis of what they wear? It is not that there are no decent men in India or Delhi or these small villages and towns but their number sure seems to be dwindling by the day. The story of the women from small unknown villages and towns of India are even more scary , the way they are gang raped, the way they are stripped and paraded naked, the way they are the instruments to take revenge or satiate the fantasies of some politically strong , hungry ruffians looking for some fun, the whole situation screams for some urgent , effective attention.

Like Haryana, or some parts of Punjab, would it be that one day our whole nation would be scared of giving birth to a daughter ?? Would every mother silently pray for a son and never a daughter, would our future generations be deprived of the love and care of a daughter??? I am really scared.