The Balancing Act

There is no pain which can be compared to a mother's pain when she sees her child suffering.  There can be no pain worse than the pain when you are brutally violated, raped and scarred for life. There can be no suffering which can be more than the childhood whose innocence has been cruelly snatched away. There can be no helplessness which can be compared to the helplessness where you can see your child's rapist and can do nothing about it , only wait for the system to do justice, a system which is rotten and stinking and has no hope of getting cleansed... What a Country, what pathetic systems??? Selfish and dangerously ambitious people sitting on important chairs... Where is the Democracy?? What happened to the the fundamental rights ???? What are we coming to?????

Here, it was only a few months ago that I wrote a post pouring out my anguish and agony over the brutal rape of Nirbhaya.  Now here I am,  again, but this time I have no words to express what I feel, all I feel is a very painful numbness and every time I look at my five year old daughter I can not just control my  tears.  What kind of human being can inflict so much pain on a baby , on such a frail child, a five year old girl child hardly weighing 20 kgs, how could he have brought himself to insert foriegn objects into her body, I just can not bring myself to write any more about the brutalities.  Doctors says her body has been mutilated to such an extent that they have not seen such a case in their career. The rapist has been compared to an animal but I have never come across such behaviour in animals, they would be ashamed to be compared to him. I feel a heart wrenching pain just thinking about the pain that child must be suffering, her childhood has been scarred forever. I

Today I am going to experiment with silence.  Sometimes silence is the only weapon, only cure and only option available but it is hard to use , but if used properly and at the correct juncture it is the most effective tool for keeping a calm mind and surroundings !!.  So many things go wrong because we say unnecessary things at unwanted times, we talk when we should have kept quiet.  Many a days I have started my day at office with a firm resolution to keep my mouth shut, but I have always, always miserably failed, today is such a day at office and today is an important day where my silence can teach me many lessons and leave many wondering , so I am going to experiment with 'silence' once again (with iron wil). Tomorrow I will update the lessons that I will be learning , infact I should say " tomorrow I will update the lessons that silence will be teaching me today " , till then take care...

Its been so long , I plan to come here often but when I open the page to write  words fail me.. I planned to slyly quit, planned to silently say goodbye to the blog and also to my writing.. but somehow I just could not...it would be equivalent to saying goodbye to my reading which I can not do without.  Life just goes on throwing some surprises, twists and turns but I am grateful to God for giving me the strength to sustain, to overcome, to grow stronger.  If I regret anything then it is  the lack of time I get with my children, I wish I could be with them more, to see them blossoming into individuals with choices and talents but most of the time I miss out on it and sometimes I so strongly want to  throw away my job and sit at home cuddling them, playing with them, help them studying, go out with them, prepare hot meals for them when they are back from school, be there with them when they are unwell or not feeling good.  These are all wishes which may not get fulfilled ever exce